To all the Mums with love in their hearts and baby vomit on their shoulder, this is for you.
There is chance that when you wake up on Mothers Day you may be greeted with the smell of pancakes and coffee after a long sleep in. There is also a very good chance a crying baby and a dirty nappy will be what gets you up at 5am.
Whether this is your first Mothers Day or you have notched up a few, you will have probably noticed there are two constants of being a Mum. Guilt and worry (and of course worrying about feeling guilty). My babies are now twenty-one and twenty-two years old and still worry is always lurking somewhere and there is that little nagging feeling of could I have done things better.
So, just a little sage advice from someone how has clocked up a few Mothers Day. You are in this for the long haul, so pace yourself. Don’t use up all the worry and guilt in the first few years. Otherwise, you’ll be just exhausted and it important to leave some for the teen years – as you will definitely need some then!
Now there are some things that you must worry about – high fevers, purple rashes and a child that is still living with you (and you are still doing their washing) when they are thirty. Things like missed tummy time or that the serviettes for your cake smash are just not the exact pink as the icing on the cake, well these are optional worries and it’s up to you if you opt in or opt out (just a little gentle advice – pace yourself you’ve got a long way to go).
And as for guilt, well that’s never too far from the surface. There is always something to feel guilty about. Now a little bit of guilt is not necessarily a bad thing as it keeps us accountable. You should feel a little remorse if you don’t strap your baby into their car seat however feeling guilty about putting your baby in day care as you need to go back to work to pay the bills is not about guilt. That is more about being pulled in different directions and needing to make a decision. Accepting that you are doing what needs to be done helps to ease the guilt.
So, as Mothers Day brings into focus your journey as a Mum think about all the things that really matter and put aside the worry and the guilt. Celebrate the strength it takes to show up every day – even on the days you are exhausted. Acknowledge that you are doing something extraordinary – you are raising a tiny human.